Falling Down

Is it weird that the summer my husband left me ended up being the best summer I've had in a really long time?? I'm trying to figure out why exactly, but I can't put my finger on it. I'm missing the summer and trying to figure out why so I can bottle the magic. Was it the new freedom? the new apartment? new roommate? the happy pills? the concerts? country music? work? home? family? friends? lovers? secret lovers? [OK, I'm just trying to ruffle feathers with a couple of those :)] I don't know...and I need to find out because I'm starting to lose it. It's been down hill since Labor Day. I'm up, I'm down, I'm healed, I'm depressed. I don't know what my deal is.

The kicker is that I love the fall. It's a great season. The sun's still shining, but there's a chill in the air. It's the season for football, sweatshirts, season premieres, Some Devil - I only listen to it in the fall, Macintosh Yankee candles, chili and volleyball games.

Now the obvious answer to what was different this summer is that Mark wasn't around. Duh, but that doesn't explain why I'm suddenly feeling down. Am I coming down from some weird high? A lot of the fall things do remind me of Mark. We loved the fall together so I think that is part of it. But oddly, some of the things that I loved in the summer are irritating me in the fall... I'm going to keep working on it.

In other news, I don't really have any other news. There's a lot going on at work, but I don't know if it would be funny if you don't work here. If you do work here, it's hilarious, but you aren't reading this...unless you're me and I'm writing it so it's to the point where it's not funny anymore because I've played it over too many times.

I think I'm going to write my next blog about Sarah Palin...or "your face" or both.