Stay Gone

I've found peace of mind, I'm feeling good again. I'm on the other side, back among the living. Ain't a cloud in the sky. All my tears have been cried and I can finally say, 'baby baby stay, stay right where you are. I like it this way. It's good for my heart. I haven't felt like this in God knows how long. I know everything's gonna be okay, if you just stay gone'.


Warning: This one might be a little bit sad. So my mom probably shouldn't read it. She can't handle the sad ones. She probably shouldn't read any of them because I think she thinks I sound too self-involved. She clearly doesn't spend enough time with me because that shouldn't be surprising.

I still feel like I'm over the hump. The worst is over and it will, hopefully, only get better from here. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean that it isn't still hard because it is. I still miss Mark. I still love Mark. I know that we can never be together, nor should we be. And I know that I will be better off for it, but it's still hard. It's even harder when he tries to stay in touch. I'm sorry, but that ain't gonna happen. He thinks he can have his cake and eat it to...well he's wrong. Sorry, buddy, but you aren't my buddy.

I just want to get to a point where I am OK alone. You know I'm not used to so much time entertaining myself and comforting myself. I know I need to figure out how to do that again. It just sucks being sad all the time. It actually sucks being sad even some of the time. I appreciate the people that have come to my aid so much. I really do, and I don't know where I would be without you. It just isn't the same as being someone's number one priority. Not that I ever was, but I thought I was, and that's what I want. I know I just have to be patient, but I've never been patient. How annoying am I? I just keep saying the same thing over and over. It's like OK, get over it already, lady. No wonder my mom can't stand to read this. Anyway, I'm tired of being jerked around. It's too hard. Just stay gone.


I still love you and I will forever. We can't hide the truth. We know each other better. When we try to make it work, we both end up hurt. It ain't supposed to be that way.